When I have the opportunity to talk with a premarried couple, here are some of the things I say:
#1: Marriage is not all about you. It is not about your happiness and self-fulfillment or getting your needs met. It is about going through life together and serving God together and serving each other. It is about establishing a family. It is about committing your lives to each other even though you may be very different in 5, 15, or 45 years from the people you are now.
#2: Getting married teaches a very painful lesion; you are both very selfish people. This may be hard to understand during the happy dating period, but it is true...and shocks many couples during their first years of marriage. It is important to know this revelation is coming, because then you can make an allowance for it and you will be a lot better off with those adjustments.
#3: The person you love the most is also the person who can hurt you the deepest. That is the risk and pain of marriage. And the beauty of marriage is working through your hurt and pain and resolving your conflicts and solving your problems.
#4: You can't make it work on your own. It's obvious that marriage is difficult; just look at how many couple’s marriages today end in divorce. This is why it is so critical to center your lives and your marriage on God who created marriage. To enable your marriage to last a lifetime you need to rely on God for the power, love, strength, wisdom and endurance you need.
#5: Never stop enjoying each other. Always remember that marriage is a wonderful gift to be enjoyed. Enjoy the little things of life with your spouse: food you like together, movies, inside jokes, laughing, games, leisure time, etc. Also make memories together, plan dates, getaways reserving time for each other after you have kids. When you get old you will then remember what you did together, saw together, and created together.
Christian Child Placement Service
e-mail: adopt@nmcch.org
http://www.adoptnewmexico.org/http://www.facebook.com/Adoption.aChoiceforLife
1-800-553-2229
No comments:
Post a Comment